saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Damn victory sex feels great
Randomize
