kristin has been a bad kristin
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
