Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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