whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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