I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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