I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
