Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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