how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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