Buhtt sex?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
