I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
