All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Randomize
