New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
