Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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