I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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