This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Randomize
