Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
I am spending my child support on dildos
this boner is exhausting
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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