Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I can't put those talents on a resume
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
