i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
