STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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