Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
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