Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Randomize
