trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize