We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Randomize
