just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
