He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
