Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
