your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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