covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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