He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
