did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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