I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
