im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I have fence marks all over my body
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Randomize
