My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
