I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
i dont even know how to be here
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
