apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
bring money and cleavage
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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