haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
