There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Randomize
