**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
