Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I'm always down for nudity.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
