Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Randomize
