I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
