I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
