I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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