I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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