Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
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