When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
