He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
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