Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
We have started to decorate penises.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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