remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
