Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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