Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Everything about him screamed your future.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
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