real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
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