Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Just high enough for therapy.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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