THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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